This is what my week consists of, and I have other non-boring stuff to write about, but I must protect the guilty. Let's just say it was another weekend of police-involvement, crazy ass Nicole, and waking up in a friend-of-a-friend's apartment because we were too stoned to drive home. I hadn't smoked in like a year, so cut me some slack.

Oh, and I did land myself a fall-back marriage partner. You know the whole, "If we're not married by age 40, we'll just do it," Friends thing.


Today I took my wretched, hateful, hated, hunk of Nazi steel in for a "service type B," which my dad insists on me getting even though it costs like $500. Have I told you how much I hate my car? Oh, yes, I believe I have. So to me, that $500 would be better spent on a pair of summer Choos.

Tomorrow I have three stories to write.

Thursday it's more Botox and a peel, which I've never had but am looking forward to. Then later in the day, it's head-shrinking time. Must get my meds before heading back to Miami.

Friday is my first gyno appt. in like two years. Hey, when you're practically celibate, there really is no reason to go there.