Shana tova! Guys are still douches, I still can't find my diamond stud that is somewhere in my apartment and I seem to have neglected to make Rosh plans. On the plus side, I'm looking forward to a great bday dinner Friday with mom and my friends—sans the douchebag obv., but with all our common friends, ahem—a big symphony party Saturday and lots more retail therapy.

I have to say though, I'd love to run into Dr. Douchebag this weekend with mom and dad in tow. Dad would throttle him and mom would slap him with her Chanel bag. Now that would be FUN.