Thursday, December 01, 2005

Friendster or Foe?


While e-mailing with another blogger today, whose site is very funny and definitely worth a read—http://www.theidlemind.blogspot.com/—the subject of e-stalking came up. This other blogger found my site through a mutual friend on Friendster, that bastion of wasted time and cyber-stalking. Not that there is anything wrong with that; we are certainly all guilty of it, myself included. I think that Friendster is particularly funny, entertaining and genius for several reasons though. First of all, it's a prime example of the inter-conectdedness of all people, most especially the Members of the Tribe. Because here's the strange thing—there seems to be a ton of crossover between JDate and Friendster. Two separate guys have e-mailed me on Friendster and JDate, totally randomly. I don't know if they know I am the same girl, but it's interesting. Moreover, while perusing the Friendster friends-of-friends, often I have seen a photo and thought, "Hmm, where have I seen that head shot before? Oh, JDate!"
Frankly, I use different photos for each site because of this whole crossover thing, and what can I say? I'm a little stigmatized by being on JDate. And, also, I am a little paranoid, I suppose, and worry that a potential suitor may look me up on Friendster, read my blog and be scared off by me before he even meets me or goes on a date with me. But obviously now I am outing myself; what the hell? Life is too short, and as the RENT song goes, "Take me as I am, or leave me." Any man I am with would have to accept the fact that I'm a writer who uses her personal life as literary material, as all writers do. And within minutes of conversing with me, people can tell that I'm a straight-shooter and speak my mind, so I don't know who I think I'm kidding anyway by trying to keep my personal life and "career" separate. It will all come out anyway in the manuscript I'm working on now, which incorporates the blog and various JDate/dating horror stories of myself and my friends.
Another reason I think Friendster is so fucking funny is that a couple of months ago, completley out of the blue, Friendster decides to initiate this new feature that allows members to see who's viewed your profile. Now, this would not have been so scandalous had Friendster actually given members warning that they were going to do this. But, nooo, this feature just popped up one fine day, and to boot, it was RETROACTIVE. Meaning, members logged in on this particular day and realized that they were sooo busted cyber-stalking ex-boyfriends, ex-girlfriends, the ones who got away and frenemies. Myself included. For about a day, we were all pretty scandalized by this new, shockingly revealing feature. And, in fact, the day it happened, my friend and I were dining al fresco at One in Meatpacking and I was telling her about the site and what it had done that day, cause she is not a member.
There were two girls sitting next to us, and they were pretty much eavesdropping on our conversation. So when I began ranting about this new Friendster feature, one of the girls butted in and was like, "Oh my God! Can you believe Friendster did that today?! I am soo humiliated and busted."
We proceeded to have a long convo with these girls next to us on the subject of this wonderful—and sometimes malicious— time-waster. Friendster eventually made this feature non-retroactive, so that now you can only see who's viewed you if you don't view people anonymously. I'm a chicken, so I have mine set to anonymous. Though luckily none of my exes, at least none of the ones I'm still interested in cyber-stalking, are on the site. Oh, the Internet age, gotta love it.
Anywho, I've been sick the past couple of weeks, unable to write, workout, go out, hangout, talk on the phone, etc. But I'm back now, ready to par-tay and be normal again. Thank God—I miss my girls! You guys rock;) And thanks again to all the randoms who take the time to read my dribble and actually compliment me on it; it means a whole hell of a lot to me, believe it or not. And more thanks to my fabulous fam for literally baby-sitting me while I was sick, malnourished and unable to function. I honestly don't know how people who don't have great families function on a daily basis.